Aligned Birth

Ep. 6 Non-Monetary Essentials for the Postpartum (Part 1/3)

July 07, 2021 Dr. Shannon and Doula Rachael Episode 6
Aligned Birth
Ep. 6 Non-Monetary Essentials for the Postpartum (Part 1/3)
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Show Notes Transcript

Today’s episode is the first of our 3-part series all about postpartum essentials. This episode focuses on the non-monetary ways you can navigate those early days and weeks after giving birth. This is a time of great transition. Give yourself space and grace as you adjust to your new normal. We share helpful tips and resources that we have learned through our own personal and professional experiences with the postpartum phase. Below are the resources we share with you in the episode. Be sure to check them out!

Borrow or loan from library: “The First 40 Days: The Essential Art of Nourishing the New Mother” by Heng Ou

Sunrise Chiropractic Blog - https://www.sunrisechiropracticandwellness.com/blog/2020/11/17/10-postpartum-essentials-that-you-cant-buy-from-the-store 

Birth Fit: https://birthfit.com/birthfit-programs/birthfit-lying-in/ 

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Editing: Godfrey Sound
Music: "Freedom” by Roa

Disclaimer: The information shared, obtained, and discussed in this podcast is not intended as medical advice and should not be relied upon as a substitute for professional consultation with a qualified healthcare provider familiar with your individual medical needs. By listening to this podcast you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others. Consult your own physician for any medical issues that you may be having. This disclaimer includes all guests or contributors to the podcast.

0:10

Hello there, Rachel. Rachel here with Dr. Shannon and we're very excited for this three part series for postpartum essentials. So today we will begin with part one covering the non monetary essentials for preparing for your postpartum. We believe that considering these things. Now, putting in the effort now will result in reward later and we fully recognize that it's not always easy, but with some preparation, some practice, and some patience. You will be able to navigate the postpartum with more ease and health, and even happiness. So, we wait, we're working on this, the outline for this episode and realize that we could easily make it into probably a three part series so that's what you're going to do today is part one, and we're going to begin by sharing a little bit about our own personal postpartum experiences so Dr. Shannon, would you like to share about your postpartum experiences.


1:22

Yeah, um, and I am excited


1:24

about this series, partly to because we started talking about it and prepping for this and realize that there's, there's so much to talk about with the postpartum time period, and


1:37

I think


1:38

for both of us that so we each have two kids, and I know my postpartum experience with both kids was so different. and so I think with that first time around I was going to that second time around realizing well maybe there's some things I could have done differently or this went really well or this really didn't but part of my


2:00

first I had an emergency C section. And so I was not prepared for that recovery period aspect to things I think so. That was really big for me part of it was,


2:16

I think what stands out to me the most in that postpartum time period after my first was,


2:22

I thought I was going to have a little bit more time off from my work,


2:26

did I actually did end up because it I thought my postpartum time period was going to be covered, like monetarily, and then come to find out it really wasn't. So, that I went back to work after four weeks. So that was really too soon, but, um, that's just where I was at in life.


2:49

However, I


2:49

also too, was like you know you had a new baby, I didn't know what to do to know what was going on and I wanted that sense of like normalcy back like my identity of, I liked my job and this is what I was doing and I could be a mom too. So there was that those are the things that stand out to me, as far as when I think of that postpartum time period was just a navigating the new mom stuff not knowing where to reach out for things dealing with that recovered from the emergency C section and the mental


3:19

aspect


3:20

of that as well and then going back to work, too soon for me. So then, you know, it's the second time around, I really wanted that VBAC, and so I put in some extra things there and then I was able to have my feedback and I took 12 weeks off with my second


3:39

big difference and I did


3:39

confirm beforehand that I was going to get


3:43

those 12 weeks and use like my short term disability and all that sort of stuff I was at a different aspect of my job so that made a big difference because with that second time around what I remember mostly is eating really wonderful salads that I would make every day for lunch,


3:59

taking my


3:59

oldest child still to daycare, because he loved it there and I just wanted some one on one time with the newborn and then I would eat lots of dark chocolate and then I would watch Ellen amazing I don't so that's the, that's what I remember from first time versus second


4:17

so


4:20

I mean there's just, there were so drastically different. And so those are the things I know they may not be the


4:24

normal postpartum things that


4:26

people think of, but


4:29

I mean and I think a lot of it had to do with that planning


4:31

beforehand, that's what I was about to ask what do you feel like the difference was the preparation we put in,


4:36

really do because, not that I wanted to prepare to have had an emergency C section I mean yes there's things you can't prepare for, but I just, I could have put in some things beforehand, I think, to maybe really look more at like the financial aspects of things and being able to stay home, a little bit longer, maybe or, you know, just, yeah, all of those things reaching out for help a little bit more and so that's where my mindset goes when I think of these non monetary essential postpartum things you know stuff that you can't necessarily buy from the store. Yeah, and I know you had


5:15

your postpartum experiences were different as well


5:17

too.


5:18

Yeah, absolutely. And so for me. After my first, I, during my pregnancy. I spent a lot of time preparing for the birth, like a lot, I did hire the doula to the childbirth education class to breastfeed in class, like it was just so hyper focused on the birth, and just getting that done, and doing it how I wanted to do it with with health and, you know, all the things and then that is important, but I spent very little time learning about the postpartum what it meant, what it might involve what I needed, just the mental, emotional, physical adjustments. And so, when I like, I just didn't have anyone around me, telling me to focus on that. And so even through all that other work I did, preparing it just either I wasn't paying attention to people who were telling me, or what but I had, you know, an eventful great water birth. So my recovery physically was minimal, like I just I felt pretty good relatively quickly and we had family come into town to see the new baby and I was immediately first into like hosting mode, and I wasn't equipped, I'm a bit of a your Enneagram, I'm a pleaser. I want to take care of everybody and I you know, that is, that might sound great but that is certainly to a fault. And so I was up and around and wanting to go visit and and not prioritizing rest or nutrition or hydration, or all the things that would actually give like help my body heal because I felt pretty good right after my birth and so I was like Okay, here we go.


7:22

And it just, I've hindsight, compared to my second birth and how I treated that postpartum. I felt like my recovery with the first actually ended up being longer and I struggled more emotionally and mentally, and I did it all, internally, I didn't seek the help, I didn't seek the process someone to process with I didn't, I asked for 0.0 help, and what I learned was my second and the reason that was different. I feel like it's because I had my home birth midwives, and I had already started training to become a doula myself and so like I had this new set of knowledge and experiences that exposed me to the importance of the postpartum. And they, my home birth midwives were like, you know, rest for those first seven days like really just take it super seriously as if it's your job, your, you know, just really take it easy. Let your body heal. Take care of yourself. Eat good drink all this stuff and I was like, oh, okay, like, this is all new for me. And so I talked to Jay about it I talked to my family about it I really prioritized like not really having visitors because I knew if I had visitors, I would go into my life, hosting mode, and trying to keep visitors away and just, I even sent my oldest to my feet like I have sisters around so they, he went to their home and was well taken care of and had fun. For those first handful of days and we just focused on the baby and recovery, and I felt so much better and I felt like my recovery as a whole body, that emotional, mental, physical, was significantly better. And so I like to spend time talking with expecting mamas, about the importance, while it is very important to prepare for the birth. It's important to consider these things for the postpartum. And we've, we've come up with these three categories of the non monetary essentials. And then the, some people to bring in to your, your village or your circle, or your postcard on our support team. And then we want to, to wrap it up with some of the tangible things that are worth maybe investing in to support you in the postpartum that kind of worked for us just what we've gleaned from our four experiences together just to sort of help you have some ideas of things to consider that maybe we hadn't even known about before and so that's what we'll wrap it up with, but yeah that's a little bit about my experiences, and I know everyone's experience is different, and like when we share ours, that doesn't mean that's what yours will look like. We share in a way of honoring the uniqueness and all of us, but also just, Just having the conversation can be enlightening, it can be eye opening because I think that's what most of us probably wished we had had the first go right. Yes,


10:21

you know, I mean yeah and it's, you can, there's still similarities within our stories though too as far as the life experiencing that postpartum that first time around and being like,


10:31

oh, oh, okay.


10:34

Wait a minute.


10:36

And so I think that's where we've really been able to come up with this list of things that those non monetary essentials that you know you've been talked about like the hosting and I was talking about going to work too soon and those type of things because all of that really impacted that recovery time. And so, I know. First up on my list is rest. And that's kind of where that aspect of you in that hosting mode, and man that like going back to work type of thing. I know that's where that that rest comes in like you thought you were rested and I was like, Oh yeah, I


11:16

feel great. I


11:17

can go back to work four


11:17

weeks after my C section. But I do think I didn't honor the rest and it's that whole aspect to have like it took your body this long to grow the baby, you're not necessarily expected to just bounce right back and I never even like to think of the postpartum any sort of postpartum journey I was like the comeback like I'm, I'm making a comeback because I'm not because I'm completely different. I now have new cells in my body, you keep your DNA of your baby so you were completely different. And I think once I looked at it like that, it was like, Okay, I am completely different now and it's okay, and that rest is so important for healing.


11:58

Girl, I love that so much and I think reframing the postpartum is not the bounce back as not the return to your pre self because exactly what you said, there is that that person is, is no longer and that's a beautiful thing, Because now you are a new version, and I made the next part of that is allowing space and time to adjust to the new version to to rest, to allow time to just be, be, be with your baby feel it out because I think all the time we hear, I just don't feel myself right because you're still in your it's almost like you're in limbo between your old self and your new self so you don't feel yourself. And so just allowing time to sort of feel, not yourself and to normalize that until time has settled, your body has recovered we've given that that time at rest for the whole body. And when we say rest I guess I like to, you know, I think that looks different for everybody and some people might say well I'm, I like to be busy. You know I like to, I can't rest I think I hear that all the time from Mama's and women especially just like I can't rest, and it's just almost forcing yourself to to rest and it takes practice and it takes having a good support team around you, your partner whoever's around you just encouraging rest and helping you take care of the chores around the house that needs to be taken care of in the food and all of that. But yeah, I think rest is incredibly, incredibly valuable and I think reframing that postpartum is the giving yourself that full 12 weeks and beyond. So that's another thing I wanted to mention too was about a lot of people, the postpartum is about, is considered 12 weeks after the baby's born, and that's also referred to as the fourth trimester, and a lot of people they go to their doctor at six weeks for that follow up, and they get, you know the clearing or whatever and they're like okay, I'm good to go. And I know some people have to go back to work with you and mentor for four weeks. Some people go back to work at six weeks, eight weeks 10 weeks, I totally understand. And just know that you can still be making those adjustments but still allowing time for that fourth trimester that full 12 weeks to really reregulate back into your, your new normal and then know that it can take up to a full year to heal and recover the whole body, because they're just being gentle with yourself and part of that is rest. Yep, most, most definitely. And


14:48

within that rest aspect of things, too, there comes that importance of hydration and are we always talk about this too, as you know the importance during pregnancy and staying hydrated, but it's also super important for that postpartum period because that healing in the body is going to be very dependent upon how much water you have and then also that nutritional you know aspect too so those two things kind of go together as far as making sure you're nourishing your body.


15:19

Well,


15:20

to complement the healing process.


15:24

That is so true and I think I see it a lot and I was the same way with my first, is it's, you will be surprised 100% And how time consuming. Having a newborn is and how exhausted you feel and what falls to the bottom of the list for most is hydration and nutrition, and I like to talk about it now, like we are so that you can be aware that what you put in your body directly affects how you're feeling. So you will be tired you will be stressed, it'll be hard, but when you're hydrating and eating well, you'll feel as best as you possibly can, right, it won't be like like exponentially worse and you just won't know it because you'll be like, I mean I'll go see mom's post I'm like I don't think I've eaten in eight hours or something. And so, some a couple quick tips for achieving that because it's easier said than done, but I think being aware of it now, and setting some things in place so that you know, some things you can do to get the water and get the food in, and just having the awareness of how important it is to recover those cells in your body like Dr. Shannon said, If I always set a glass of water or we usable bottle at every place I was going to either be sleeping or nursing. So next to the couch and the bed and the nursery and just try to keep them and have my heart you know have my husband or whoever was there to help me, so that every time I sit down I could drink a glass of water. Did you have any thing


16:51

that was what


16:52

I remember, you know I'd be nursing, all throughout the night. And so, I would my husband would feel so like, he would just kind of stand at the doorway, and I'm like nursing and I'm like,


17:03

Dude, you know,


17:05

It's not helpful for you to just be up as well, but then he would be like okay, let me go get you some water so he get the water at all points, and then he would, you know, get some rest as well too, because we do need as much rest as possible between the both of us can't forget that as well. But yeah, it was kind of that, that was always his big thing, too, and I remember, remember that and he was always making sure.


17:33

I love that that doesn't share with my expecting dads, with the partners is like this is one very easy, like win for you, just help them stay hydrated helps


17:45

feel so helpless to because mom is so attached to Baby baby is so attached to mom. So like, don't get it, but there are so many things that they can do to show that love and that care and that support and to help during that postpartum period, too.


18:01

Yeah, and to tie in nutrition, which I know we both value greatly and we know the benefits of it. Again, eating good nutritious meals tends to fall to the bottom of the list but some quick tips and resources for having the nutrition and the postpartum is, I recommend reading the first 40 days and it's a book, I'll link it in the show notes, I think we've referenced it before but it's all about nourishing the postpartum. Mother. So learning, reading that now right learning about what that looks like and why it's so beneficial to many aspects of the postpartum recovery. And then I like to recommend making ahead of time some lactation protein balls I have a recipe that I share, I'll link it in the show notes as well. You can make it head you can freeze them and it's a quick grab like of good nutrition you get good protein and fiber. And what do you need to sort of have that boost of energy it also supports lactating. The other tip I have is a, if you are into smoothies or you want to try getting into smoothies, I highly recommend you can make one in the morning and sip on it all day but you get veggies and fiber and healthy fats and protein, all in one meal. So just prioritizing having those ingredients if you can, or a simple versus a more simple version of the, of the green smoothie that I share whatever you can do. It's a quick easy way to get those good nutrients into your body because just like hydration helps recovering the cells, so it is good nutrition and it helps with breastfeeding and it helps with energy levels and all of that so I will link I have two great recipes for those that I'm happy to share, that's what got me through my postpartum. So I like to share those with. I love it every month, and I love to that it's


19:45

that it's almost that little bit of preparation that can make all the difference too, because I don't think I did I think that was another aspect between the difference between my first and second was like maybe I felt like completely unprepared for like healing from everything. Versus, and maybe partly to is because, Oh, I've experienced this before, and the second wasn't quite as traumatic as the first so I think there was that aspect too but, you know, it's kind of looking at those things beforehand and planning so it's looking at those foods and meals and I know for me,


20:20

I love salads, I'm a little biased,


20:22

I make a really good salad because I just get a salad mix, and I just put all the things on it that I want, I'm one of those. I like fruit on my salad that everybody does that is so like that is black and white people do not like fruit or they do like fruit but I put


20:35

my fruit on Monday,


20:36

you're like you're good unless it's like a dried cranberry, I would do.


20:41

I put strawberries, blueberries, But I


20:42

would make it different every day so


20:43

it'd be carrots and cucumbers and celery and beets and whatever I had in there walnuts and stuff and I would miss make this giant salad and it didn't take me long to prep it it's like there was no cooking involved, it was just all raw, just gonna have this stuff in your fridge,


20:57

you just have to


20:58

have that yeah, in the fridge ready to go and so that I don't know that was a big thing for me like I said, That's what I remember from my second and then dark chocolate, making sure you have


21:07

this gray it satisfies that sweet tooth, it's got all the antioxidants in it, it's wonderful, you know your salad reminds me of we call it the kitchen sink salad, and it's like when we're you know trying to clear out the fridge or whatever you know it's, I do like I can make, I like a lot of things on myself and just not just. That's okay. That's okay, finding what's works for you, and I just knowing that that good nutrition right filling your fridge when you can, with those healthy ingredients, thinking about what you like now and that was a big fruit, like I ate lots of watermelon and cantaloupe and strawberries. I watered a lot of water and, which is so


21:44

good and fiber Yeah,


21:46

yeah, so I craved those like I devoured massive amounts of watermelon. And I think that's what my body needed so fresh fruit like veggies and that does cost money, we recognize that as a complete, you know, being fortunate enough to have those things accessible but again finding what you can get your hands on thinking about being intentional with what you're putting in your body, and understanding that has an impact on your sleep on your recovery, like we've talked about with rejuvenating yourself, and on breastfeeding and all of that is like the cyclical, like one thing leads to the other thing, and so trying to have a positive cycle, and know that that doesn't mean you're going to feel like you can go climb Mount Everest or something, but it can help you feel your best. Amidst a very challenging in that healing process that healing process is a major event. If you've had surgery even more major but even if you have a bangin Oberth uncomplicated, that also, like, recovery is recovery and it's emotional it's mental, it's so many things and I say that a lot but I know you have some great advice for, we talk about risks, but also then that intentional return to movement and the importance of that.


23:09

Yes, man.


23:09

That's so funny because in my head I was like oh she said being intentional I'm just gonna go straight into that being intentional Good move, and so


23:17

I know like, like I've mentioned


23:19

before, I've got


23:19

these like 10 Essentials, which can't buy in the store aspect of postpartum and I have on that same list I have rest and return to movement so I know that that can seem, you know you told me to rest and you're telling me to move like that it's


23:34

but it's not quite


23:35

that because it really is starting back with that breath work and being intentional with that deep belly breathing and like that just that return to the basics almost because this has been, you know, a big life changing event so


23:53

it's anything even if there's


23:54

any time that you've had like an injury in your life, it's


23:56

like, Okay,


23:57

now we're going to go back to the basics to work our way back to where we were and I think part of that. With that postpartum time period is that return to movement, the breath work, the being intentional with things, even if it's just light and gentle movements, you know, tag cow Child's Pose just returning that flow back to the body I think can be so nourishing as


24:23

well. Yes, and I think a lot of people focus on like When can I start my regular workout when I was doing before and everyone's like, well, six weeks you can be cleared but it's way before that, that this kind of this kind of movement and this kind of activity that you're talking about. And again, this wasn't information I had after my first, and I really wish I had as far as the, the core, breathing, and the the gentle movement, and also being informed about some of the core and pelvic floor. Gentle exercises you can begin within a few days of the bath, and how that can protect your pelvic floor from a long term negative side effects. And we talked, we will talk more about pelvic floor therapist and our next series and the importance of learning about what you can do like some simple exercises you can do on your own at home in bed sitting down while you're breastfeeding, whatever that can help restore strength to the pelvic floor which if you've been, if you've had a Syrian or vaginal birth has undergone a lot of stress. And so I think the pelvic floor is not spoken about enough. And that, that kind of physical activity begins, pretty quickly after the birth, and just being aware of how your body feels as you're doing those things, like you said that intentional conscious. How does it feel when I do this and just being totally gentle on yourself and knowing that I mean exercises I did before my first i There are still some that I have not fully returned to because they just don't feel the same. Right, my pubic bone is is way more tender. Now like so like side plank is an interesting one, I'll just say that like,


26:13

oh yeah,


26:14

I don't have the same. I have to do like a supporting side plank versus have like full on and that should my body just, that's how it was after I gave birth. And so just how does that feel when I do that and obviously do the things that feel good and listen to your body as you're trying these things out, and I know you also had a great resource I think we'll just link it but it's by birth fit, and I think they have a great resource that they you were, you had mentioned to me about sort of that intentional return to movement some guidance,


26:45

right, they've got some great, you know, it's called Birth fit so there's some great aspects to pregnancy, and using that as movement during pregnancy and that sort of thing too, but there's also some wonderful things as far as using those breathwork tools into that postpartum time period as well so that diaphragmatic breathing and just being intentional with those, with those movements do and knowing too and we talked about this, I think you mentioned it knowing too that like that return to exercise and like where you were, it will, it will come, bit my crib, which is fine. You know I am a runner and so after both of my kids, I wanted a, I wanted to train for a race as far as. Now, back in the day this was years ago when I was thinking this is like my I was terming it my postpartum comeback race but then, you know, Now that I've grown in knowledge, that's really not what it was because this was my, this was just my postpartum. This was my, my new body was out here doing this, you know, and I had, I've run my fastest races in this postpartum time period of my life so there's no, that will come, not what this is but impatient with yourself. Exactly, exactly. Now, there's also some like mental aspects to things and it's something I call. I called it in terms of guard your peace. And I think I mainly thought of this because there was one very specific moment so my youngest was born just like a couple weeks before Christmas, and which that can be a tough time because you might have family coming in town. People are expecting to see you and see the baby and blah blah blah, and I just remember at one point we were with family, and I did not


28:40

want to be there anymore.


28:42

I just wanted to take my baby and I just wanted to go, like I just wanted to go and so I remember saying, Oh, I left part of my pump


28:53

like something from my pump at home, and I have to go home, go free. Recognize I was like I need to get out of here.


28:59

That's also like that's


29:01

that saying no, that's guarding your piece that surrounding yourself with what you need, and realizing what you don't need. And I don't know,


29:12

and listen to yourself, I think right there was you listening to your intuition of like I, I came. I'm ready to go. And I, you know, and leaving if that feels right or you know, being okay with not even going in the first place if that doesn't feel right. And I think I, I love this concept and again, a comparison between my first and my second again with my first we have family like in town within like a day of the birth of my first and that was where I wanted to go so and with the second, I was like, Can you please just not book your flight, until the baby has arrived. I went like with both of my so when they booked their flights with the first, they were like, oh, surely the baby will be here by now. It'll be fine. And I went for two weeks. And so with that was knowing that I was like okay, we don't just start going to have to wait to book your flight so that I didn't have that immediate, so that was what I felt like was already my piece particularly saying even once the baby's here we want. We want some time on our own. And the things I talked about with my clients, in regards to this. Is it super hard, so family is hard, especially if family is forcing or like more forceful with wanting to be, you know, insist on seeing you and the baby, and it's harder for you to say you know I really just need some time, most, most people instinctually don't really want to see a lot of people in that time but yet, culturally, there's those pressures to show the off the baby for people to want to see you and


30:46

all of it to not disappoint you know you don't want to tell someone no right has well they might, their feelings


30:52

might be hurt. Right, and I think let that go and I just didn't from my own experience I speak from seeing so many moms postpartum say very similar things so sure. Do you, do you 100% But know that it is worth it to set those healthy boundaries. Before the birth, like I say, if you know you have those like people are gonna be showing up on your door right after baby's born, talk to them, respecting and go ahead and have those conversations now, even as hard as they are and say, You know what we really just want some solo time for the first few days we'll let you know when we're ready for visitors have those conversations beforehand so that when it comes time. They're more on board with it, and I know it does it's not easy. I'm not saying it's easy but it is worth it, and clearing the calendar and not, not planning anything immediately if possible. And part of guarding your peace and protecting your space is really only letting people around, even at that time when you are ready for visitors who are going to bring positive energy, supportive, either around the house or bringing food or renominated about them, they're just going to help you. They're not going to bring extra stress, they're not going to be invasive with telling you have things like your baby. Those are the people you want around, so being conscious of who you're allowing your space, and asking for what, like you said, like I knew that you had to use a pair of yourself in that moment where you had to get out of that, that family event, like, that's asking you for what you need, whether or not you made an excuse to go that the path you identified it you spoke it, and you did it. And I think that takes practice, and it takes being aware and being okay with disappointing people because it's not about them. It is not about them, it is your baby, it's your experience that you have to live with the rest of your life. If someone is threatening being upset at you for not letting them come see the baby day one. As hard as it is, you're the one that has to live with that forever, they don't. That's what I tell my parents do about both, like if you have nurses or providers who aren't being timed it's like it's your experience for the rest of your life. So, you to do what is going to benefit you, even if someone else is disappointed because if they're disappointed, that's on them. And I know that's hard but,


33:11

and that is hard, I mean, that's still hard even,


33:15

even without dealing with that, you know, it's my forever.


33:19

It's like, it's life lessons for Yeah, but that's, I don't know that's that whole aspect of,


33:26

like, the mental health, look at that, I mean you're full of hormones, it's just you got to check in with yourself and say this doesn't feel good right now. And so, I, you know, You've got to let the guard prophecies.


33:39

Yes, and that's beautiful and I like that phrase and if that's all they take away from this that that's a driving phrase that okay I don't know what to do here, and my guardian VIPs, and then I know, okay, what can I do to get there because that matters more than everything as you are navigating an emotional time of up and down time. I think that's a great, simple way to do that. And then I had another thing to share about recognizing and being real that the postpartum is not easy, even with a better second post part of this. It is not an easy time, and I don't ever want to scare people or talk about the bad but being real, and saying, it is this huge adjustment, and to, if you can find the tiny moments of joy. I used to say if there was just like 10 minutes of a baby napping and I felt good and I got to eat a yummy salad for lunch or like I said like, I, I was like really selfish, because the next two hours I might be having a plastic baby or it's just finding the tiny moments of joy, and just sitting with it for the brief moment that it's there and know that, that it will just ebb and flow, that it's that that's normal. Right. I don't know. Does that make sense. Did you do anything like that.


35:05

Oh yeah, because I remember a second time around I remember all those little moments of joy, you know, it was like, like I said, dark chocolate and


35:12

was savage you chose to focus


35:14

on that. And just, yeah, I don't know, really comfortable within that postpartum


35:23

timeframe, and that those expectations of like, I don't know I am a busy body and so, I do.


35:31

I try not to identify by how many things I can get done, but you know I do have lots of to do lists, and so try not to identify by that and it works as far as like, oh I can do these things, these things done in a day I could clean and do this it was like no, I kept my baby today, you know, because I haven't told you to that you're pretty much, you're breastfeeding all the time, those being realistic with that, the expectations, and I think when you are you are realistic with those expectations, then it is easier to find those moments of joy because then instead you're like well crap I did I'm thinking about all the things I didn't get done well. What did I do was good yeah what was,


36:19

what was the good


36:21

today. I love that. I love that and it's, I always like to follow that up with I don't like to be like Frou Frou like around this whole like oh positive mindset, it makes it all easier but it is a simple practice, it's, it's attainable like you can, it's an easy reach. If you choose it. It doesn't cost any money, and it can it can help you get through this time, in a way that leaves you feeling better. It's just one of those simple, simple things.


37:09

It doesn't cost any money, and it can it can help you get through this time, in a way that leaves you feeling better. It's just one of those simple, simple things, and I know it's not easy for everyone and if you have tried this and maybe you've done all these other things and you're still not feeling right, I also want to encourage you to seek that, that important professional assistance and care to ensure your, your mental and emotional health, are taken care of, and that it's okay to not, if you're like, I've done these things I've been patient I whatever only my blessings I'm, yeah. And it's like, something's still not right, trust yourself. I think that's probably the moral of the story. Listen to yourself, trust yourself. Seek help the sooner you can seek care, the quicker and shorter like you can get recovered and have less severe downline effects so just want to say that as well as that this is not a perfect formula for a perfect postpartum at all, it is what we have found to be beneficial what we've seen in our own lines of work and what we've experienced personally and just hoping that any bit, that you're like oh I want to look into that more and it leads you in a direction that is, is better than I feel like that's worth it to just always doing what works for you, and taking, taking what works and leaving the rest.


38:31

So true cetera. I love it. All right,


38:35

do you have any other things on our non monetary list.


38:39

I think that's, that's it, and I think that it's hopefully gonna leave some people with some things to think about and consider and that's the goal. And I'm excited for part two which will be will be next week's episode and it's going to be all about the people of your postpartum and your village and your circle and building that so I'm looking forward to sharing that with you guys but that is all I have. What about you,


39:03

Dr. Shane here,


39:05

that's,


39:05

I think that's a pretty good,


39:07

pretty good list and pretty good start.


39:09

Okay and I'll be sure I'm like, link the things we mentioned in the show notes so you guys can have those resources. And that's it for today friends. Have a good one.


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